


There's A World We Knew As We

by Snap_crackle_spock



Series: Bonds Broken [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Anakin as Darth Vader Content(tm), And I wrote like 400 words of Ahsoka walking through post-Empire Couruscant, F/M, Honestly the slow-burniest of all the things I've written for this series, Me: relying way too much on flash-backs to tell this story, Set between the prequels and the main trilogy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:41:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22764895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snap_crackle_spock/pseuds/Snap_crackle_spock
Summary: Anakin Skywalker was dead.This point was no longer up for debate, as Anakin himself had come to realize.
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, Anakin Skywalker & Obi-Wan Kenobi (referenced), Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker
Series: Bonds Broken [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1565923
Comments: 2
Kudos: 43





	There's A World We Knew As We

**Author's Note:**

> Pre-emptive celebration for the s7 premiere of Clone Wars this Friday!
> 
> (Set at about Section V of How To Break A Force Bond but also functions as a stand-alone if you don't want to read the other things in this series)

Anakin Skywalker was dead. 

This point was no longer up for debate, as Anakin himself had come to realize. 

Being the new face of the Empire, the muscle to execute Palpatine’s wishes, meant that there was no longer an opportunity for a chip in his armor. As a Jedi, Anakin had let himself get distracted from his allegiances. He let his emotions get the better of him, the relationships he made along the way dictate his actions rather than his sense of duty. 

Palpatine explained to him once that this was not because Anakin had been weak, but because he’d had no choice. The Force in all its mysticism would push and sway everyone to where they needed to be, even if it could seem like a failure to those shortsighted enough to not understand the will of the Force. Like a petulant child, he had once believed that every person had a hand in creating their own destiny. He’d foolishly believed that even if the Force might push someone somewhere, they’d always have the choice to walk away. 

He’d known someone who’d walked away. 

But no more. That life was over, and Anakin Skywalker was dead. 

Having impenetrable armor proved to be a more difficult task than originally anticipated, though, because that meant that every aspect of the Emperor’s plan needed to be fully executed without room for error. The clones had served their purpose, and once he would’ve felt bad for tossing them aside after Order 66, but Palpatine had begun adding in more humans in positions of power as the clones’ rapid life cycles began entering their next stages. 

They had served their purpose. All the Jedi were dead. This was why Anakin Skywalker had to die. 

A chip in the armor is enough room for fatality. 

He believed this. 

He definitely believed in this. 

* * *

Somehow, despite switching sides and publicly denouncing the bureaucracy of the Order, Anakin found himself in more meetings than ever. Incredibly _useless_ meetings, he should clarify. 

At least the ones he was allowed to partake in at the Order involved planning sessions for upcoming battles, discussions of possible younglings ready to move up to be Padawans, or even a classic case of a public figure being held for ransom and the Council needed to figure out who to send. 

Meetings for the Empire were mostly about fuel usage, what star systems had grown too rebellious and needed new heads of state, or how many new Stormtroopers needed to be drafted to account for the rapidly decreasing supply of clones. All of which couldn’t have interested Anakin any less. He’d thought that by swearing allegiance to Palpatine he’d been tossing aside useless meetings in favor of direct action in all cases. Instead, it was beginning to feel like he was never actually going to see a fight again. 

_“Master Windu must really like hearing himself talk, huh?”_

_“Snips-”_

_“I’m just saying I think he’s been going on about the Trade Federation for half my lifespan by now.”_

_“Ahsoka-”_

_“I’m_ old _now, Anakin. I’ve become a Master. I’ve become a Grandmaster. Tell me if I look a little blue around the edges, I think I might be becoming one with the Force.”_

_“If Obi-Wan were your master he’d have you go through your forms a hundred times just for talking while your superior is discussing key information.”_

_“It clearly worked so great on you.”_

_“I’m trying to be a good Master and keep my Padawan in line.”_

_“You couldn’t keep me in line if you tried, and Maker knows you haven’t done_ that _yet.”_

_“I’m going to report you to the Council for insubordination if you don’t cut this out, Snips.”_

_“Fine, I guess I’ll be forced to confess all that I know. Like how you constantly dodge requests to sit down with the Masters using the excuse that you’re meditating, yet I’ve never seen you meditate.”_

_“I meditate.”_

_“Sure. Horizontally. While snoring.”_

_“And I_ definitely _don’t snore.”_

_“Tell that to my sleep cycle. It’s like listening to a star destroyer land.”_

Moments like this would approach Anakin in a way not un-similar to a Loth-cat stalking its prey. Silent and creeping in the corners before it was too late and he was sucked into the past for a fleeting moment. If Palpatine was to be believed, and he was _always_ to be believed, this was a problem. If Anakin Skywalker was dead, there should be nothing left tethering him to the past. 

He’d thought that this new Empire of which he was critical to was supposed to be the polar opposite to the Jedi Order. He’d thought that, by turning his back on the Order with finality, it meant that he wouldn’t have to follow their rules of nonattachment and enlightenment and he could just live his life with his wife, his kid, and some happiness. 

His wife was dead. His kid was dead. He wasn’t allowed to hold on. He was on a tighter leash than he’d been on than when he’d been a part of the Order. He felt trapped and he didn’t know how to change it again. He couldn’t go through that again. 

_“You’re a menace, Snips. You’re so lucky listening to you deliberately disobey my authority is much more interesting than whatever Master Windu’s saying.”_

_“I know, Skyguy. It’s why we’re such a good team.”_

* * *

“My Emperor,” Vader –it was never Anakin when he was talking to the Emperor. Not when he was near enough for his thoughts to be heard– said as he knelt to the floor, only stumbling a fraction on the way down. He was still getting used to the new prosthetics. It had taken him an eternity to become accustomed to having a mechanical hand. Having two more metal limbs to learn and adjust was an even more difficult challenge.

“My apprentice,” Palpatine said, still facing away from where Vader was still bent down, looking out upon the stars. Vader could hear the disappointment in his voice. He’d caught the stumble, the crack in the armor. “What is it that’s been keeping you from performing duty?” This was a rhetorical question. They always were. It was more a way for Palpatine to let him know that he’d caught Vader losing his footing and was aiming to snap him back into his place.

Sentimentality was the answer. The exact same thing that he would get constantly reprimanded for at the Order was exactly what had been keeping him from his new duties. 

Ever since he had turned from the Light Side, his former bonds had been shut out. Obi-Wan, who he’d still yet to hear any word of, including a notice of execution, had become severed. He felt as if he’d taken the bonds he’d held with everyone –Obi-Wan, Padme, Ahsoka– all for granted when he’d had them. The reassurance that they were there somewhere in the universe made him feel not quite alone, even on solo missions where he wouldn’t have contact with any of them for countless days. 

He’d felt the minute that his bond with Obi-Wan had snapped. He’d been the one to break it, after all. The second that he’d ignited his lightsaber on Mustafar and turned on his once-friend, that had been it. The second their fight had started, he’d no longer been able to predict where Obi-Wan would strike next, the way that he once had been. 

With Padme, he didn’t know when it had broken, only that their connection had been severed when he’d woken up with two new limbs. He’d reached out, tried desperately to find her, only to come up empty. Palpatine said she’d died. He couldn’t even feel how true that was for himself. 

But with Ahsoka, there was a difference. After she’d left the Order, he’d tried and failed to convince her to come back, and he’d hit a wall each time. Eventually, he tried less. Eventually, he felt like it was better to stop altogether. Eventually, he turned his back on everyone and aided in a coup that involved wiping out all of the Jedi, and he thought that maybe it was better if she stayed away because that meant that maybe she’d still be out there somewhere. 

Realistically, she wasn’t. The clones who had executed Order 66 had been her friends, which meant that they’d known her. That she’d left. He couldn’t imagine that they were shortsighted enough to leave a known, incredibly adept Force user running around with lightsaber that, yes, he’d passed along to her through Padme. 

They weren’t that bad at their jobs. 

Right?

The Emperor could never be so blind. 

But he’d had been intrigued enough to consider the notion for himself. Sentimentality: his inevitable downfall. 

“My apprentice,” Palpatine said, and Anakin – _Vader–_ was snapped back into the present, “I’m assigning you to oversee the overthrowing of Nakadia’s government. Its agricultural resources are vital to sustaining our growing regimes, and warlords that will take money without question in exchange for the use of the land will be much more efficient than their current oligarchy.” With that, the cold silence returned, and it became clear that Anakin had been dismissed. 

“Thank you, Master.”

“Do not falter,” Palpatine said as Anakin turned to leave, his still unfamiliar suit falling heavier than he was used to on the way out, “and do not forget who you are, Lord Vader.”

Vader. Right. 

* * *

_“You know, if you would just admit that_ I’m _the one that should be teaching_ you _Jar’Kai, this would be over a lot faster and you’d be able to go hop in the ‘fresher before going over to Padme’s,” Ahsoka said, taking advantage of Anakin’s surprised reaction to sweep her leg underneath him and point both of the practice blades at his throat._

_“Who told you I was going to Padme’s?” He sputtered as he let his own practice blades shut off and took her already extended hand to help him up._

_“Uh, you did?” Ahsoka laughed, drawing back into a low crouch to begin another round, the light of her blades bouncing off her montrals, “you told me yesterday that you were accompanying Senator Amidala to that new Phono-play as her official bodyguard. I don’t know why you have to, since it’s not like she’s proposing any bills right now that someone would want to kill her about, but whatever. No questions asked. More time for me to relax and do a Tibanna facial.”_

_“You know, Snips, as Jedi we’re not really supposed to be concerned with our outward appearance.” He laughed, settling into his own defensive stance._

_“Is that why they make all of the male Padawans get_ that _haircut?”_

_“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”_

_“You know,” she said as she leapt forward, causing Anakin to raise the two blades he’d taken up for the day in order to help her learn her own dual-wielding techniques, only for her to dart quickly to the left at the last second, “the one that they made you get while you were still Obi-Wan’s Padawan?” she suddenly came in from his side, and he only barely blocked the attack._

_“There’s nothing wrong with that haircut!” He protested, tossing his blade up in the air to switch his grip and slicing down to her exposed back. Taking the correction, she quickly moved one arm to catch the blade with her own, before darting out of his range again._

_“Sure, Anakin. Sure there isn’t.”_

_He felt a push through the Force on his shoulder, though he didn’t fall for the trick and blocked her second attack, catching both of her sabers between his._

_“How did you even get your hands on the materials for a Tibanna facial? Aren’t those from Cloud City?” Slice._

_“I know a guy.” Parry._

_“Who?” Slice._

_“One of the clones.” Dodge._

_“You convinced one of the clones to smuggle across the galaxy for you?” Defend._

_“Like you haven’t.” Attack._

_“I haven’t.” Counterattack._

_“Guess I’m just more likable than you.” Disarm. Literally._

_“Kriff, Master, I’m so sorry.” The metal hand lay on the ground between them, still holding the now-off practice saber. The duo just stood there looking at it._

_“You know, the last time I used Jar’Kai the_ exact _same thing happened-”_

_“Anakin I-”_

_“Snips, it’s fine,” he chuckled as he bent down to grab the hand, “it’s been glitching recently when it comes into contact with the hardware they use in the practice sabers. It’s really not your fault at all.”_

_“I still feel bad about it, though.”_

_“You’re not supposed to,” before she could chime in again, Anakin made the executive decision to put on his teacher robe for a second, “I know that we kind of dance around the Jedi Code, maybe a bit more than we’re supposed to, but just take it to heart for this one. There’s nothing you could’ve done, literally at all. You didn’t even know what happened until I told you. Don’t beat yourself up over something you can’t fix.”_

_She took a second to mull his, uncharacteristically Obi-Wan-like, words over before shutting down her own sabers and nodding. “Okay, Master.” She took a few steps before turning around to look at him, “thank. Have fun at the Phone-play.”_

_“I will, Snips.” As she rounded the corner to head back to their shared room, he quickly called out, “If you really want to make it up to me, pour me a cup of caf!”_

* * *

“Lord Vader,” one of the commanders interrupted Anakin’s thoughts as he stared out from the bridge of the star destroyer, “we’re about to exit hyperspace. We’ll be arriving at Nakadia shortly.”

Anakin had been aware of this. In the past few years, he’d been apprenticing the Emperor, he’d grown more accustomed to the Force than he’d ever thought was even possible. Still, he didn’t want to discuss the inner-workings of the mystical energy surrounding them with his subordinates. 

“Thank you, commander. That will be all.”

The other man just nodded curtly and whisked himself away from the Sith Lord. 

Something about Nakadia felt strange to Anakin. There was the constant pull of the other Force users that could be found on any planet, yes, but something felt stronger about this one. He’d encountered particularly strong citizens who seemed to be blind to their potential, or even the Inquisitors that the Empire employed for these very purposes, but even that didn’t match what he felt emulating from this otherwise nondescript Mid-Rim planet. 

It felt almost familiar, though closed off from him. In the way that Mortis had twisted his perception and ability to read the Force, something from this Nakadia was calling to him. 

* * *

The former Nakadian Oligarchy of Elders had been overthrown. It felt nice to have a use for his lightsaber after so long with just training droids that, in full honesty, had never posed a challenge. 

In celebration, and partially in warning, the Empire had arranged a show of strength and power for the capital city, where all citizens would watch a military procession as the Empirical Forces made their way through the city and back to their ships. It was a commonplace occurrence for planets in similar situations, though Anakin himself was rarely actually in attendance. 

As they made their way down the main road, he felt that pull again, like a call home and to arms. It felt like it was rooting itself a part of his brain that he’d long-since disregarded. At first, it was nothing more than a pestering hum, but as he walked with the Stormtroopers another block it became a roar.

Just when he was about to break ranks to go off to find the source for himself, the tidal wave came rushing in. It felt like a dam had been ripped apart because suddenly all he could hear was the flood of everything that had been guarded against him. 

Years of missed communications, pent up emotions, loss and hurt and catharsis and acceptance and the bond he’d abandoned about after swearing he never would. 

_Hey Skyguy-_

He looked up to where he knew she was sitting because for the first time in a very long time he could feel their bond a way almost close to the way it once was. He looked up, still being pushed back with the intensity of everything he’d missed, and looked his former Padawan in the eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> I think this is like my 5th addition to this series? Anyway, if you couldn't tell, Anakin and Ahsoka are my favorite characters.


End file.
